One would think govt buses are the most entertaining places in the world, considering that I am inspired to write another post about bus rides. Maybe it is the Mother Nature's way of propagating Her agenda to reduce pollution and get everyone to catch a bus... So here are a few more regulars I notice among my co-passengers, apart from my last post:
- The avid music buff who HAS to display his impeccable taste by playing Reshammiya's latest hits on his mobile phone armed with impossibly loud amplifiers
- The lady armed with what looks like two truckloads of vegetables. Any whisper of a sign from the conductor about paying extra for luggage will promptly be stopped in its tracks by a basilisk stare worthy of making Rajnikanth suffer from self-esteem issues
- The Spitter : Look left, look right, aim, shoot!
- Man Sitting Behind The Spitter : The expression he gives to The Spitter is worthy of putting him in serious contention for the Award for Best Villain (what else is the Filmfare award for "Best Actor in a Negative Role"?)
- The Marwadi businessman on phone, who happens to cause great chagrin to all owners of ears within an approximate 50-mile radius from him
The list could go on and on, but I need to record this incident that happened today for posterity purposes, lest it gets lost in the distant recesses (and nooks and crannies and lofts etc) of my mind. The bus I rode today happened to host an almost-pass-out-drunkard (this in the high and dry Gujarat), which, when brought to his notice, did not go down very well with the conductor, because as he had accurately deduced, the man had spent his last paisa on liquor and was trying to ride for free. After telling the drunk man exactly what he thought of his entire khandaan, the conductor stopped the bus and started to kick him out. The drunkard probably realised he was too drunk to give a fitting reply, and instead nicked the conductor's ticket punching machine and ran off with him in hot pursuit. The conductor didn't take long to come back with his machine, which was probably as well, for people were starting to sprain their necks and fall off their seats in their attempt to follow the proceedings to the last gaali.
Duration : Approx. 8 minutes.
Entertainment value : About 1200% paisa vasool on the Rs.5 bus ticket.
- The avid music buff who HAS to display his impeccable taste by playing Reshammiya's latest hits on his mobile phone armed with impossibly loud amplifiers
- The lady armed with what looks like two truckloads of vegetables. Any whisper of a sign from the conductor about paying extra for luggage will promptly be stopped in its tracks by a basilisk stare worthy of making Rajnikanth suffer from self-esteem issues
- The Spitter : Look left, look right, aim, shoot!
- Man Sitting Behind The Spitter : The expression he gives to The Spitter is worthy of putting him in serious contention for the Award for Best Villain (what else is the Filmfare award for "Best Actor in a Negative Role"?)
- The Marwadi businessman on phone, who happens to cause great chagrin to all owners of ears within an approximate 50-mile radius from him
The list could go on and on, but I need to record this incident that happened today for posterity purposes, lest it gets lost in the distant recesses (and nooks and crannies and lofts etc) of my mind. The bus I rode today happened to host an almost-pass-out-drunkard (this in the high and dry Gujarat), which, when brought to his notice, did not go down very well with the conductor, because as he had accurately deduced, the man had spent his last paisa on liquor and was trying to ride for free. After telling the drunk man exactly what he thought of his entire khandaan, the conductor stopped the bus and started to kick him out. The drunkard probably realised he was too drunk to give a fitting reply, and instead nicked the conductor's ticket punching machine and ran off with him in hot pursuit. The conductor didn't take long to come back with his machine, which was probably as well, for people were starting to sprain their necks and fall off their seats in their attempt to follow the proceedings to the last gaali.
Duration : Approx. 8 minutes.
Entertainment value : About 1200% paisa vasool on the Rs.5 bus ticket.
Ah. Fellow buff commuter. Yef, thatf a lifp. I don't mean you travel in the buff, i mean you travel in a buff. Okay? Bye. :p
ReplyDeletehahahaha.. that's the best lisped word after "suck". (I dare ya to say it aloud) :P
DeleteI faid it out loud right now. Ha! In your fafe! :p
Deletethatf ok, lifp mein fab maaf hai :))
DeleteYou mean to fay i can fay fex? Fo much power! :o
ReplyDelete*ignores, hopes poster dunks his head in the nearest bucket of water to dissolve all that extra empty space in his head*
Delete